Rages From the Heart: The Dream or The Ambition...

Tuesday, September 04, 2007

The Dream or The Ambition...

Whatever I choose, there's always a feedback...

A lot of things has been happening lately, and I can tell you, it's really making me crazy. I need an advice. Please, can you help me make a decision?

1.) For all of you guys out there who knows me a lot, music has been and will always be a part of my life. I once dreamt of having our own concert with our band or at least, have a music video aired in either Myx or MTv. But then, I know that before the famous bands out there became what they are today, they first seeked for gigs and such. And finally, one of my bandmate found a place where we could start. It's just a small bar somewhere in España. I would like to try it out sometime, but then I'm thinking that my tight schedule right now wouldn't allow it.

2.) I've been playing bowling for a year now and I must say, I'm getting better at it. When I was starting, getting a score of 130 was harder than understanding the Laws of Gravity. But then, with a lot of practice (and I mean a LOT!) my average score went up to 180+. I can say it's an achievement but, as my co-bowler said to me: "Don't be satisfied with what you have right now. Strive harder, Aim high! Pasay!"

Yes, I strived harder, and I must say, it was worth it. My sister's coach told me to join their training for the Asian Schools. This is really a big opportunity for me because my ambition to be a member of Team Prima will not be that hard to reach. (Prima is one of the most prestigious bowling teams not only in the Philippines but in Asia as well.) But big opportunities means big adjustments. Time will be a problem because of the Trainings and Tournaments. It is hard finding a free time as it is. I want to be a member of Prima but, I have a life too...

Whatever I choose, there is a negative feedback hanging onto it. I don't want that feedback to happen to me again. I once made a decision that changed my life forever. I'm afraid of making the same mistake as I did before. Why is it so hard to choose?! Please, help me decide...

It is hard finding time for us to talk as it is. I'm afraid that if these things would take all my free time away. I don't want to take the risk. I don't want to make the same mistakes all over again. I don't want to lose her again... I'm scared...

Whatever may happen, I hope she would understand that all I'm doing right now is not mainly for myself. I want to have a stable career. Money doesn't grow on trees. I don't want to be a fat slob sitting around, doing nothing in the future. I'm thinking ahead, I want to earn my own income. Not just for me, but for her as well...

Promise me you won't leave my side. Promise me you won't leave me. Promise
me... Please...
I'm afraid of losing you.

Labels: Decision Making, Drama, Love Life

posted by icarus_05 @ 8:07 AM Comments: 6

The Music they shared

The Author

Pseudonym: Icarus05
Birthday: April 25, 1990
Address: Novaliches, Quezon City
Province: Infanta, Quezon
School: University of the East
Course: Computer Science

Sports: Bowling, Volleyball

Hobbies: Bowling, Playing Guitar, Writing Stories, Writing Songs, Chatting, Blog hopping, Stargazing, Flyff-ing, Playing Ragnarok

About me: Single and Waiting! ;) A night person, very passionate and dedicated to everything I do, A lover trying to find himself and his true place here in the world...

Lost in this cold place, Never knowing where to go, I need you, I need someone, I need anyone

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